On Saturday afternoon, I was able to meet up with a friend from Wisconsin (only the 2nd familiar face I’ve seen in person in 6 months!). The designated location: a truck stop just outside of Atlanta, Georgia.
Why a truck stop, you ask? Well, I was asking the same thing too. But it seemed the best plan since my friend was riding shotgun in a semi truck, coming from making deliveries in Florida with his friend. (I don’t suppose one can simply pull up to a cafe in a semi.)
Never having been to a truck stop before, I wasn’t sure what to expect. But, after hurrying inside to get out of the cold rain, a cozy little diner greeted my eyes. It was quite a fine little place to catch up a bit with my friend over tea.
Ears wide open
Now, as we were talking, I kept noticing an old, weathered man sitting right next to my friend around the bar-like counter who was, every once in a while, glancing over as I talked – obviously listening-in just about the whole time. –Goodness, when you’re sitting right next to someone, eating lunch alone, it’s difficult to keep yourself from eavesdropping on the people next to you, I imagine.– The longer we talked, though, the more I began to realize that my friend and I were one of only two pairs of people there. Everybody else around the counter was eating by themselves -probably relaxing after a full day of driving.
Well eventually, this older man next to us chimed in after I said something. It did not take long before it was the three of us in conversation. And, though with a somewhat soured face, our new friend, Don, had soon shared with us a broken synopsis of his whole life’s story, along with his thoughts on life, politics, and relationships.
While this spontaneous conversation was pretty neat in and of itself, what was even more special was that both my friend and I had opportunities to share a kingdom-focused perspective in response to some of the things Don has been observing throughout life. This man, having grown up around Catholicism, seemed to be unaware that there was much more to religion and faith than dull church services and nuns who slapped him and his younger brother in school. Oh dear. Well, in what ways we could, we shared with him the life and purpose we each have found in living for God’s kingdom, and not this world.
Craving connection
I couldn’t help noticing as the three of us talked, that others around the counter were listening in too, holding their gaze on us for a while, before turning back to their plate or cup of coffee. Goodness, one young man across from us even chimed in several times and we ended up learning that he was from Wisconsin too.
I was struck by how incredibly hungry these (pretty much entirely) men were for meaningful connection with other people. Now, I know people in individualistic America have gotten pretty disconnected – especially with the appearance of the internet and social media. But, even if someone lacks community with others and close friendships, many people, I think, can live under the illusion that their social needs are being fulfilled just by casual work or extracurricular interactions and scrolling through a news feed to keep up with friends.
But then you’ve got people like Don, going for three weeks on the road at a time. Having spent just a few weeks living out of my car, I feel like I can say with at least a tinge of credibility that I know what life on the road does to a person. Without the easy casual conversations that come from weekly social situations around home, one cannot get by with simply facebook and the occasional phone call to close friends. Without even those easy, casual conversations, it becomes impossible to ignore how disconnected you are from a close support network of people. Unless you are someone who deeply dislikes having to be around people in general, I think such an experience of travelling alone for a living would leave a gaping hole – one that cannot help but be felt by the truckers, I imagine.
Now, while most people in general (this is my own observation, at least) do not have significant close community ties, I am not so sure most are even aware enough (with the placebo of social media) to know that they crave it. Having spent a lot of time recently searching for people who want to connect in a meaningful way, I was really taken by surprise with how many people at this little truck stop in Georgia were open and seemingly eager to engage and connect with others around them.
I think many of these men have grown accustomed to the solitude and not fought against it (-because, it IS a struggle that must be actively engaged in every day and every place that life on the road takes you!). But still, I imagine they were well aware of their inner need for connection, even if most were too tired to take the effort of looking up from their food and making a comment like Don had to me and my friend. But having done so, I sensed that Don was really refreshed by our (what turned into a several-hours-long) conversation with him.
A huge opportunity!
Visiting the truck stop left me with so much to think about. Hearing from Don what it was like to spend one’s entire career driving trucks, I started to grow in empathy toward all of the other men in the little diner. I wish my friend and I could have engaged more people in conversation. So many others there had no one interested in talking with them.
With driving done for the day, nowhere to be, nothing pressing to do, and a relaxing meal ahead of them, it seems like there would be no better place to find people who are open to conversation. Certainly, everyone has their own interesting stories to learn from. But also, there’s no telling how much it could mean to a trucker just to have someone show interest in them enough to start a conversation. And if, while talking with someone, there is an opportunity to share Truth and Christ’s love, imagine how much more impact it could have on any of the possible ears eavesdropping in as they eat to themselves.
It would be really neat to return to rest stops like that sometime and just spend time getting to know people there.
. . . I do realize, however, that that might not have the desired effect going alone as a young woman. . . It does seem like a man or multiple people going together could be much more effective at sparking good conversation with the truckers.
There is such a need for something like a truck stop ministry where people simply would show up, grab some food at the counter, and befriend these people who are passing through. So many people starved of – but seeking! – human connection. What a need there was just in that little truck stop diner. Now imagine how many trucks our (excessively materialistic and convenience-seeking) culture has sent around the country every day… how many people make their living by travelling alone in a semi truck… how many similar diners are filled with people craving meaningful connection.
Out of Place 